DAY 210

Drugs to consume and men to share with. One and the same today Love. Walking to speak with myself of images removed. I express a concern at once to bring them back in while allowing myself to step out. What a concept. The resolve came and I am here. From a man no less. Not The but A. We sang. It was that simple distraction that brought me back. Shhhh, I am here.

DAY 204

When you are gone I miss the world. To miss a part is to miss it all. I cry for the space but must trust the path. You are half way around the world and I am not lost. Do people fall in love to simply escape from themselves? Is it even possible to fall anywhere? Are we not already here? A friend once described real true love as not being able to live without the other. But I want to be able to live with as well as without you. It is most important to remember that one cannot live without themself, therefore we must focus on loving ourselves while everything else falls into place.

DAY 189

Like pulling water from a stone. This needs to be easier. They say it gets better. I know. Why does everything look more attractive through reflection? I am having a day of doubt. How many are we allowed per year while still claiming we aren't depressed? I don't know what I am but lost. My heart beats and tells me I need to start in a different direction. What that means...I miss you dearly. I miss myself too. I am going back to mine. I hope to see you when I get there. Thank you for your time. Healing is in order now. Love you always.